Thursday, March 15, 2012

X-Raying The Legendary Children

Some of the best videos on YouTube are the fifty second Go Sees shot at various modeling agencies and posted online. I find them fascinating because they show models in unguarded and unadorned ways that tell you a lot about the way they work.

I’ll start by presenting you with one of my favorites, Ranya Mordanova*, registered with The Ford Modeling Agency. The Go See video format begins with a verbal introduction, followed by a walk and then a quick profile. The video takes all of forty-five seconds. Ranya has a good, classic runway walk, stands well, and ends with a classic profile.

Paul Boche** is seen here at a Go See at MTC (Maurilio Carnino Casting). A “Go See” for those who don’t know is a sort of audition for modeling work in editorial, runway or other various commercial projects. Even if a model is hot or famous they still do them just to touch base with the agency.

In this video Boche looks a little nervous but still shows dynamic presence in front of the camera. His height is so imposing that walking through the narrow hallway is a little touchy. Cool video.

Misha is from Russia, in case her heavy accent doesn’t already give it away, and registered with The Ford Agency, too. She has a very good walk and manages to keep a good poker face in spite of the models in the background laughing while she’s breaking into her model stance. Her stance, by the way, is very good.

Francisco Lachowski from Brazil is a pretty dynamic print model, one of my favorites, in fact, but here his walk looks very underwhelming, not his strong suit. In fact, Robert Mitchum going fishing looks more dynamic than this walk. It’s pretty weird to see where some models' strengths lie. Some are better before a camera and others are better live on the runway. I always assumed they were great at everything.

Stephanie Rad from England is the exact opposite. Although I find her facial expressions in editorial print to be somewhat lifeless and even frigid, here she comes off as animated and pretty happy. She also walks in the classic model style, one leg crossing over another, and then breaks into the most badass pose, her legs spread out defiantly. And that's how you sell fashion designs!

* Previously seen in “No Runway In The Sky”, February 29, 2012.
** Previously seen in “Once Rock Stars Looked Like Models But Now Models Look Like Rock Stars”, January 12, 2012.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Springtime For Sweet Tooth

It was just about a year ago today that I blasted out of my nightmare job at the LA County Board of Supervisors and contemplated on my future. After clerking for the County since 1991 and feeling burnout setting in I needed a change of scene. You couldn’t have picked a more radical change of scene than working in wardrobe for the upcoming Sony Playstation 3 game, “Twisted Metal”.

Knowing virtually nothing about the story of “Twisted Metal”, what little I gathered from it, was that it takes place in suburban Anytown USA, where people are granted any wish from someone named Calypso, a sort of anti-Wizard of Oz. An evangelist named Preacher advises everyone to resist Calypso, but like any good conscience gets tossed aside.

One of the main characters is an ice cream man gone psycho killer named Sweet Tooth, a killer clown with a WWF type persona. A scarred model equally gone batshit named Dollface launches a vendetta towards supermodels on the runway. She looks a lot like Bruce Timm’s Calendar Girl from the Animated Batman Series, but I digress. Because this is a game in the driving genre (a la Grand Theft Auto) there are road rage rivals for Sweet Tooth, like The Dead Riders and the black Evel Kneivel father and son team, Grimm and Grimm Jr. Where a lot of this goes, I don’t know, because I don’t own the game or belong to the TM cult (this is the third version of the game). All I know is that the film we worked on turned out beautifully.

Rebecca was hired to work on “Twisted Metal” because she had a long resume of having created costumes for a wide variety of games, including “Infamous 2”, “Batman: Arkham Asylum”, “Saints Row”, “Gotham City Impostors”, and many more.

“Twisted Metal” was filmed at the Sony games sound stage in a suburb near San Diego in the middle of an industrial park (natch). Rebecca fabriced costumes and fitted the actors while I assisted her and grabbed clothes that were needed ASAP. I also had fun distressing ice cream vendor uniforms, mental institution inmate gowns and other uniforms, ironic given I had just shitcanned the most institutionalized government job in the world.

The footage was shot in front of a green screen, like in movies like “Sin City” where backgrounds are computer generated. Some of the costumes we fabricated:

Sweet Tooth– crazy polka dotted clown pants on white soda jerk uniform, held together with bondage-style leather suspenders.

Dollface – Red and black leather catsuit, more Emma Peel than Harley Quinn.

Grimm – Another evil onesie, this time with the Evel Kenivel drag look, but ghastly and ghoulish looking.

The Supermodel – beautiful red draped dress that had to be form fitting for the model that didn’t get cast until the day before shooting. (Yeah, it was a lot like that).

And as I said, for someone who just blew out his government job out his ass I had to distress a lot of uniforms: Doctor, Nurse, Policeman, Security Guard, Asylum Inmates, etc. I must have been the envy of every fetishist in the world! Makeup shared the same tent as we did so we were amused at Sweet Tooth getting fake scars applied to his body, because he had enough real ones to begin with. Paul was a great guy and had a million war stories for every scar he had.

One scene shot showed young asylum inmates cursing Calypso for driving them mad by granting their wish in exchange for their sanity. Every shot had to feature them wearing dirty, stained pajamas and wearing a strait jacket. We could only afford one strait jacket, and it had to look like it had vomit, spit and piss all over it. This required a few cans of creamy soup – Cream of Potato, Cream Corn Chowder, Cape Cod Clam Delite, etc. We debated on which was worse: the look or the smell of the fucking thing.

The asylum inmates were kids who worked in the Quality Control section at Playstation, so the opportunity to be in a game was thrilling to them. It was my job to dress them and for a brief moment I felt like somebody’s Dad. “Don’t forget your wallet”, “How old are you?”, “You have to take your nose ring out!” After the mind fuck of the government, I was going through a whole ‘nother mindfuck.

Just because it was a video doesn’t mean that the egos on set were any different than they would on any TV or movie shoot. There were attitudes, but mostly from the lackeys in the crew. The actors were easy to get along with except for one minor character who had problems understanding the meaning of the word “retake”. I guess he wasn’t used to using a shovel digging graves. He should intern for a month at Forest Lawn Mortuary.

Multitasking brought on a new meaning when Rebecca was called on to play stand-in for Dollface. When she played Dollface she wore the skin-tight outfit for long shots. The crew really woke up when they saw her – they’re probably still looking at the pictures they shot of her. She also played a Dead Rider in the video.

The shoot took about four to six weeks, and if memory serves most of the days were cold and drizzly. The sound stage wasn’t heated at all so our tent was very dark and damp. I could relate to the Crazy Calypso Kids based on our surroundings, so it didn’t take a lot to convince me to run out to the mall 25 miles away to grab stuff from Victoria’s Secret or Neiman Marcus. By the time the shoot was over and done I was ready to get back in bed with some grain alcohol, feeling more than a little bit like Sweet Tooth after scooping too many spumoni-on-pistachio waffle cones.

Fast-forward to the following year and “Twisted Metal” is finally out and it looks amazing, fun to play and cinematic as well. I don’t own any video games and don’t profess to being an expert on them but this is definitely one wild, cool, sickening joystick pounder. And I even got a credit on it. How wild, cool and sickening is that???

Get Twisted Metal here and drive yourself crazy!

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

No Runway In The Sky

One of the greatest fallacies in the past few years is the idea that people can’t be shocked anymore. Well, probably not by dullard careerist rock stars and bullshit cartoony painters (“Obey” my ass), but the fashion world still has a way of getting people’s panties in a bunch, and that’s where the action is.

Andrej Pejic is a 21-year old model who looks more like Deborah Harry than George Clooney, and it’s bugging even the most liberal fashion fans. Why? Because he models womens wear just as well as menswear. And he hasn’t had surgery or other cosmetic enhancements done. In Andrej’s case, the best woman for the job is a man.

As you can see Pejic looks more rock & roll than anything in years, so whether he’s fronting a woman’s dress or Bowie-T.Rex glammage he looks positively hypnotic. When he’s not looking like an ultra-cool rock star he’s upsetting fashionistas by modeling outfits like a see-through wedding dress for Jean-Paul Gaultier’s collection during Paris Fashion Week. He was also a top model for Marc by Marc Jacobs Spring/Summer 2011 campaign, and also walked down the runway for Jeremy Scott, who really gets around.

Other modeling episodes in recent months have included a magazine cover banned from Barnes & Noble for posing in a see-through dress (no joke) and posing in a Marilyn Monroe tribute that’s more convincing than that Michelle Williams travesty. Another gender-bending feather in his cap was his work in the advertising campaign for Dutch retailer HEMA wearing red dresses and women’s lingerie. Not bad for a war baby born during the Bosnia-Herzegovina massacre.

Andrej Pejic is signed to DNA Model Management (New York), and is registered at 10 other agencies in each country. The Talented Mr. Pejic is ranked at Number 18 in the Top 50 Male Models on websitemodels.com. Well done!

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Another cure to the female model cliché blues is the amazing Ranya Mordanova. Coming from the Russian Federation, she looks Asian as she does European, creating an otherworldly quality in everything she wears. If anybody looks sci-fi, it’s her. The art of presenting fashion isn't only dependent on designers and photographers, but also on intriguing models like Pejic and Mordanova to sell them.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

House Of A Thousand Mysteries

In 1995, former Mystery Science Theater host Joel Hodgson had a program called “TV Wheel” which featured a weird skit about a guy called Vick Lawston who manically plugged a magic/joke shop catalog. There was also a freaky chimp puppet called Pumpernickel who screamed all through the skit. To many younger viewers it was absolute dementia, but to the Baby Boomer dudes out there it was a fresh breath of nostalgia.

Because there really was a guy called Vick Lawston who advertised his magic catalogue in the back of comic books in the 1960’s, and, yes indeed, he had a crazy monkey mascot called Pumpernickel. The catalog was called “The House of A Thousand Mysteries” and it was the coolest book you could ever own. Even if you didn’t have enough money for the magic tricks or joke shop pranks, just the bitchen illustrations in the book were worth the price of the damn thing.

Vick Lawston’s magic shop operated out of Fort Lauderdale, Florida, and his catalog (50 cents – cheap) was jam packed full of tricks and pranks, at least ten per page, and this thing ran for close to 175 pages. While the cover of my catalog has a 1966 copyright date a lot of the photos of Vic and drawings in general look a lot closer to the Forties.

The catalog could be enjoyed as a stand-alone book with its depiction of rubbery men with faces like jackals either fighting baldness or obesity, while all the magicians depicted inside were unbelievably handsome, dashing and/or sensually exotic. All magician’s assistants were stunningly sexy goddesses of erotic pulchritude, but before Mom could accuse us of viewing smut, Lawston would toss in Pumpernickel to keep it all clean and boyish (hyuk!).

Many of the magic tricks sound like names of punk bands: Magic Producto Box, Ghost Card Trick, Enchanted Cards, St. Peter’s Lesson, The Obedient Silks, and Razor Blade Trick, to name a few. Sounds like the line-up at CBGB’s in 1976!

“House of 1000 Mysteries” was completely aimed at little boys, focusing on the two things they love the most: magic tricks and monkeys. The only thing I ended up ordering from the catalog was a book called “Houdini On Magic” by Walter B. Gibson. “Houdini On Magic” was a compilation of manuals written by the great magician on various tricks, escape routines, and his thoughts on the whole séance and spiritualism racket. If the name Walter B. Gibson sounds familiar, it’s because he was also known as Maxwell Grant, author of the legendary “Shadow” pulp series.

While I don’t purport to be an expert on magic and probably never wanted to be a serious magician I couldn’t forestall the seduction of mystery and saucy humor Vick Lawston presented to us feverish kids in the Sixties, and for that he’ll always be enamored as trash-culture titan extraordinaire, monkeys and magic and all.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Comme des Garcons Fall/Winter 2012 Paris Fashion Week

Even before it takes time to have the post-Christmas blues it’s time for fashion’s major designers to present their latest collections at Milan and Paris Fashion Week, which both showed last month. All the poop on Milan Fashion Week zoomed right by, but it’s never too late to give you the full skinny on Paris Fashion Week.

Before I go any further, I need to give credit to The Fashionisto, a great mens fashion website, for reporting all the amazing highlights at Paris Fashion Week. If you’d like to see more from them, here’s their URL: http://thefashionisto.com/

While many designers showed their collections at Paris Fashion Week, I personally enjoyed six designers in particular that I thought were the most outstanding. I liked the collections from Hermes, Agnes B (who knew?), Lanvin, Yves Saint Laurent, Dries Van Noten, and Kris Van Assche. My favorite one and the most idiosyncratically rock & roll was Japan’s own Comme des Garcons.

The Comme des Garcons Fall/Winter 2012 collection was resplendent in bizarre punk Edwardian waistcoats of clashing plaids, polka dots, occasionally draped in waist coats, capes and pleated skirts. Designer Rei Kawakubo forsakes the dandyism of a Galliano or Westwood by investing a more hard-boiled glam/punk appearance to her models, all the way down to Keith Richards/Ron Wood/Jeff Beck wigs.

While the other designers showed sartorial elegance with printed fabrics from Dries Van Noten, brilliant tailoring as usual from Saint Laurent and soft leather outerwear (Hermes doing what they do best), CDG knocked me out the most this season. Wouldn't it be great to see a band dressed like this for a change?